Goodbye Cancer!!

I can't believe I haven't updated my blog since my surgery.  There were times when I thought about it, but for some reason I just didn't do it.  Now here I am, six weeks out of surgery and almost ready to go back to work.  This season of my life is officially over.  And I have great hope for what is to come!

Going back to the Thursday of surgery, Mike and I got there nice and early in the morning -- 5:30 a.m.  It's a good thing I got to go back to sleep because mornings and I do not get along!  When the anesthesiologist came in he gave me the choice of having a thoracic epidural, along with my general anesthesia.  I was already told by one of my colleagues that if I was offered this I should take it.  It turned out to be a great decision as it eliminated the need for the morphine pump after surgery, and allowed me to be alert and not so groggy in the days following.  The surgery went as expected and lasted about 4 hours.  The only surprise for Dr. Larson was that my left ureter(where my kidney was removed 3 years ago) had scarred itself to the left ovarian artery.  He took the time to dissect the two apart, but after doing so realized that my left ovary "didn't look so good".  He made the decision to remove it.  In the end I gave up my uterus, cervix, left ovary, appendix, pelvic ligaments, and 35 lymph nodes.  Yep, 35!

My hospital stay was three nights, as expected.  Unfortunately the hospital has not fully converted to private rooms and they were quite full the first night so I ended up with a roommate.  Bernice was around 80 years old and had a hard time hearing.  As a consequence of that she and her husband shouted at each other, the nurses talked extra loud to her, and we watched the Nightly News with Tom Brokaw at volume 40.  Go ahead and put your tv on volume 40 if you want to get an idea of what it was like.  At one point after we had both turned out the light the first night, Bernice started shouting that she was getting out of bed.  Well, as I said, she was around 80 -- and on top of that she was in the hospital for a knee replacement!  Needless to say, I yelled back to her to stay in bed and immediately called for the nurse.  She seemed like a sweet lady and she sure kept me occupied that first day! The next morning Bernice went to the nursing home and I really dreaded getting another roommate.  That afternoon the nurse came in and wrote the name "Pam" on the white board, and shortly after they brought in another bed with a gal much younger than Bernice!  Pam had a friend named Renee with her.  Over the next couple of hours we got to know Renee while Pam slept.  She told us that Pam had a tumor(thankfully benign!!) removed.  I just remember feeling so bad for her as she was on a morphine pump and really out of it.  A short time later a private room opened up and the nurses came to get Pam to move her.  This time I was sorry to see my roommate go!  Although we saw Renee off and on the rest of my hospital stay, we didn't get to talk to Pam much.  When we left the hospital I felt a little sad knowing that we might never see those girls again.  Ranee lived out of town and I wasn't even sure I would recognize Pam again since she had been in bed most of the time I saw her.  Little did I know how wrong I was...

On Sunday Mike was able to take me home.  I was really tired, but otherwise I was feeling pretty good.  I was so fortunate to have little pain.  The gas pains I had after my kidney surgery never came this time. For that I was so thankful!  My biggest battle was nausea.  I dealt with that in the hospital when they tried to give my narcotics.  I decided to stop the narcotics, but the nausea persisted.  Luckily they gave me meds for it and within a couple of days it was gone.

On the Tuesday after surgery I was supposed to get my pathology results.  All of my tissues had been sent to be examined to look for any cancer cells that might have spread past my cervix.  If that was the case I would need to look at further treatment.  I didn't get a phone call on Tuesday and went all day Wednesday without hearing anything.  Finally at about 8:30 p.m. Wednesday night Dr. Larson called me.  He said that pathology had been going over everything "with a fine tooth comb", but they could find absolutely no evidence that the cancer had spread.  Praise the Lord!!  My treatment was officially over.  

The next couple of weeks were spent mostly resting and trying to recover my strength and appetite.   I was feeling pretty good and starting to get out to my boys' games and a few other activities.  But then just 2.5 weeks after surgery I started having very sharp pains in my right lower side/abdomen.  They would shoot around to the back.  It was a Sunday and as the day and evening wore on they got worse.  I went to bed with heat and took Tylenol and just prayed it would go away.  I was up off and on all night.  On Monday I called my doctor's office.  Unfortunately Dr. Larson wasn't in, but his colleague Dr. Johnson agreed to see me.  After a few tests Dr. Johnson felt it was probably a strained abdominal muscle.  I was already scheduled to see Dr. Larson for my check up the next day.  When he saw me he was less convinced of a muscle issue and grew concerned about my sole kidney.  He arranged to get an ultrasound done that Thursday.  The good news was that my kidney looked great.  The bad news was that I had a hemorrhagic ovarian cyst that had ruptured and spilled blood into my abdomen.  That explained the pain.  There is a chance I will have these again in the future, but Dr. Larson is hopeful they will not be as painful and will eventually go away.

Last week Mike and I were eating at El Mezcal when a familiar face walked in -- it was Renee!!  And I was pretty sure the girl with her was Pam.  I insisted we go over and talk to them -- it was a great reunion!  Pam looked great, although she said her healing was going slowly.  It's amazing how a simple hospital stay can create a bond between people!

Yesterday Mike and I went to Marshfield for my last post-op visit.  Dr. Larson was very pleased with my healing.  He plans to see me every six months for the next two years.  I am fortunate that the chances of my cancer recurring anywhere else is very low.  There is a 92% chance that I will be just fine.  I like those odds! But the best part of the day -- we walked out into the waiting room and there was Pam!  Now I count her as my friend :)

As I look back on this whole experience it's almost surreal that it even happened.  Because I didn't have to go through the months of chemo/radiation that so many cancer patients do I sometimes feel like I didn't even have cancer.  But the word is real -- and it's scary.  I am just so thankful that it was caught early and could be dealt with swiftly.  Let me get my public service announcement in for the ladies -- please be sure you have your Pap smears done!  October was Breast Cancer Month and although mammograms are also extremely important, I hope the other cancer screenings won't be neglected.

I don't know that I can ever thank everyone enough for all of the cards, text messages, phone calls, visits, gifts, meals, and most of all prayers.  It's so humbling to know that you all took the time to care!

As most of you know, my blog started 3.5 years ago as a kidney donor blog.  I am a huge proponent of organ, tissue, and blood donation.  Since my kidney donation I believe it is my mission in life to bring awareness to the incredible need for these donations.  This was a little bumpin the road, but it's time to get back to the original plan.  Last week I had lunch with Sara, her daughter Ashlyn, and Sara's cousin Kathy.  We are already planning our next project!  Stay tuned for what you can do to have fun while promoting organ donation!

Almost Surgery Time

It's been just over six weeks now since that dreaded phone call from Dr. Ruta telling me that my Pap smear was abnormal.  Sometimes it feels like a lifetime ago.  Other times it feels like it happened yesterday.  I've been caught in this strange waiting period.  It's been a busy time with work and the boys' football games.  When Ike is throwing the football, Josh is catching the football, or I am discussing an "eye" diagnosis with a patient, I can totally forget my health.  But then out of the blue I will suddenly stop and remember I have cancer.  And I don't really look like a cancer patient I guess.  I suppose that means I have been feeling pretty good.  Well most of the time I can say that is true.  After all, I have been living life as normal and for that I am thankful.  But some days I am so physically tired and other days I am just mentally tired.  And mostly I am just ready to get going with the next step.  

This past Monday I saw Dr. Larson.  He was very happy to see that I healed up nicely from my biopsies.  Then Dr. Larson, Mike, and I sat and discussed my surgery.  It will take place this upcoming Thursday(September 25th) as planned.  I won't know the time until the day before, but Dr. Larson thinks it will be in the morning.  The surgery will take approximately four hours.  We are planning on a three night hospital stay.  As he told me before, along with the usual hysterectomy he will also take pelvic ligaments and lymph nodes to be tested in pathology.  We also discussed whether or not to take my ovaries.  I had some concerns about keeping them as my dear aunt Muriel died of ovarian cancer. And let's be honest, if my cervix tried to kill me why should I trust my ovaries not to do the same??  Dr. Larson did tell me, however, that there have been studies done that show women who have their ovaries removed prior to menopause are at a higher risk for stroke and heart disease.  I did not know that!  So, it sounds like the best course right now is to keep them and hope they behave!  He did tell me though that he will actually be relocating them to a new area -- under my ribcage.  He explained that on the chance that I would need pelvic radiation now or in the future, tucking my ovaries under my ribs will keep them out of harm's way.  And then he told me that I am also going to be getting a bonus appendectomy.  The right ovary's new home would be very close to the appendix.  If I were to ever end up in the ER with pain in that area the docs would not know if it was coming from my ovary or my appendix.  So goodbye appendix!  Good thing I have so many spare parts I don't need!  Kidney, appendix, uterus -- who needs them anyway??  My friend Jolene did tell me that I may need them to add extra stuffing though to fill in the empty spaces!  Yesterday I saw Dr. Ruta for my pre-op physical and I am good to go.  So here goes nothing...

I have to say one more thing about my diagnosis and it is going to sound weird to some of you.  Many people equate cancer with chemotherapy and hair loss.  Because I have the possibility that surgery will take care of my cancer, I have been sort of feeling like I don't really have "real" cancer.  Not that I am in denial or anything, but just that I don't feel like a typical cancer patient.  So the other day I had a patient in to see me who had colon cancer a few years ago.  She just had to have surgery and that was all.  I was telling her my feelings and she said, "Exactly!  It's like you aren't in the club!!"  And she was right!  That was the perfect explanation.  Now I am not saying that it is a club I want to be in, and I am not trying to say that anyone has treated me differently because I might have an "easier" cancer than a lot of people do. And I'm not looking for any sort of sympathy.  It's just a feeling I have and I thought I would share it.  Maybe some of you can relate?

And let me just say that people are awesome.  The messages, cards, texts, phone calls, hugs, flowers, well-wishes, and most importantly -- PRAYERS -- are overwhelming to me.  It is so humbling when you find out how many people care.  I have often gone to a funeral and wondered if the person who died knew when they were alive how many people truly cared about them.  Well, I am one of the lucky ones who sure does know it!  

Just two days ago my friend Jill was waiting on results from her own medical tests.  She messaged me Thursday afternoon and wrote the devastating words, "I have cancer Jill".  She was diagnosed with thyroid cancer and will see a surgeon soon.  It breaks my heart to see more people going through this.  But as I told her -- "Look out cancer.  Jills rock!!"  And together we both plan to prove that!!

See you on the other side of surgery!  

God's Plans and "That Word"

Up until this point I have written mainly on the topic of my kidney journey and organ donation.  The next blog post I had hoped to write was going to be about my whirlwind speaking tour that I was already planning in my head.  I had spoken to Tara Storch of the Taylor's Gift Foundation about doing an event here in my town to raise awareness for the need for organ donors(if you don't know the story behind Taylor's Gift please visit www.taylorsgift.org).  I just knew that spreading the word of organ donation was my mission and I was cruising in that direction.  But once again, God reminded me that my plans are not always His plans.  He stopped me in my tracks with one simple phone call.  And that one word that changes everything....

At the end of July I had a routine physical and a Pap smear.  I have never had a single bad Pap result in all of my life, so I walked out of Dr. Ruta's office that day and didn't think about the test again.  In fact, my biggest concern was only that my kidney function numbers would come back okay.  Dr. Ruta told me that day that all of my blood work and the physical exam looked great.  She went so far as to pronounce me the "perfect specimen".  I was feeling pretty good about my 42 year old self.  The next week I was waiting for my son to get done with football practice and talking with my friend Lisa when my phone rang.  I saw that it was the clinic's number, but it was 7:15 p.m.  Because I work in the same clinic as Dr. Ruta I thought maybe she was calling to talk to me about something work-related.  Imagine my surprise when she told me she had my Pap smear results in front of her and they were "not good at all".  I asked her to read me exactly what the pathology report said(because as a doctor I like to hear the medical jargon!)  She read these words out loud to me, "Atypical glandular cells, favor neoplasia".  I asked if that meant what I thought it did.  She replied, "yes Jill, they strongly suspect cancer".  Now I have had a lot of family members, friends, and family members of friends who have had cancer.  I am no stranger at all to the word, even though I wish I was.  But something about the doctor using that word in relation to my own health....well, there are no words to describe how it feels.  Dr. Ruta promised me she would make me an appointment very soon with my gynecologist in Marshfield and said she was very sorry.  I hung up in total disbelief.  Thank God my friend Lisa was there because I needed to say the words to someone else to make them real.  Lisa too was stunned.  At that time my son Josh came out of the locker room and I realized that I was going to have to tell my kids...tell my husband.  I felt sick to my stomach.  I tried to keep up a brave face for Josh's sake so that he wouldn't suspect anything was wrong before I talked to my husband Mike.  When we got home he went upstairs and I took Mike into our bedroom.  I started crying before I could even get the words out.  He was in shock.  We simply sat there and hugged and cried.  Then we took to the internet.  We looked up the type of cells I had and were shocked to find out that these cells show up on less than 1% of all Pap smears.  Unfortunately we also read that they are responsible for about 20% of all cervical cancers and they are more aggressive than the more common squamous cells.

Fortunately Dr. Ruta called back that same evening and told me she had gotten ahold of Dr. Sampson, my gynecologist.  It just so happened that I was already scheduled for a mammogram in Marshfield the next day and Dr. Sampson agreed to add me on to the end of her day.  Mike and I met with her and she did five biopsies of the cervix and endometrium.  She told us before we left that her gut feeling told her they would find something when the biopsies were sent to pathology, but she was optimistic it wouldn't be much.  That night we told our boys, along with my sisters and parents.  I dreaded calling my mom as she has been through so much herself with her lymphoma, but we wanted them to know.  It was the longest weekend of my life waiting for the results of the biopsies.  Dr. Sampson was gone on Monday and Tuesday. so Dr. Ruta was watching the computer to see if the results came in.  By Tuesday afternoon when I hadn't heard anything I decided to walk down to her office.  Together we checked and saw that the results were in.  She pulled up the report.  As she scrolled down the screen all I saw was, "Biopsy #1: Endocervical carcinoma in situ. Biopsy #2: Endocervical carcinoma in situ.  Biopsy #3:........same".  Only one out of 5 biopsies came back WITHOUT cancer cells.  My heart sank and Dr. Ruta gave me a hug and I fought back the tears. Within just a short time Dr. Ruta had made me an appointment two days later to see Dr. Dale Larson, a gynecologic oncologist in Marshfield.

I have to admit I was a little nervous to see Dr. Larson. I had heard rumors around the clinic that he can be pretty tough.  I wasn't sure what to expect.  But within 2 minutes of him walking in the room I knew right away that he was our guy.  He was warm and friendly and put Mike and I at ease right away.  He spent an incredible amount of time going over all of the details and possibilities with us.  I was scheduled to have a cone biopsy that afternoon with him and he told us that the results of that biopsy would guide our next step. Either way I was going to have a hysterectomy -- the type would depend upon whether or not the cancer was invasive, and that is what the cone biopsy would tell us. He did assure us that he felt this was caught early and it was his gut feeling that the cancer was not invasive.  But he also told us that because I had the more aggressive type of cells(glandular) that any invasion at all would mean that we would go the more aggressive route of treatment -- the radical hysterectomy.  That afternoon I went into surgery and had the cone biopsy done.  And then the "results waiting game" started again.  This time however I was much calmer. I felt that whatever came was what was meant to be.  And I knew that Dr. Larson was the doctor we were meant to have.  And I also knew in my heart that the results would show invasion.  I'm not sure how I knew, except that I knew looking back that I had a few symptoms that I didn't realize were symptoms. And the thing about cervical cancer is that there are no symptoms until it is invasive. So even though Dr. Larson didn't think it would be the case, I just knew that it was invasive.

The next Monday evening at about 5:30 p.m. Dr. Larson called and said he was sorry to tell me that the results did indeed show that the cancer had become invasive -- by about 3mm.  It's crazy to think of 3mm. It sounds tiny, but when you are talking about invasive cancer it suddenly sounds huge!  Dr. Larson told me that I will need to take at least four weeks for my body to heal from the biopsy before he can do the hysterectomy. It sounds scary to leave the cancer that long, but the risk of infection is just way too high for them to go in any sooner.  And he assured me that there would be no further spread in that short of a time. So on September 15th I will see Dr. Larson for a check of the biopsy site.  Assuming all is healed I will go into surgery on September 25th. He will remove all of the "usual" hysterectomy organs, plus lymph nodes and pelvic ligaments.  All of the tissue will be sent to pathology.  If there is no spread to the lymph nodes then my treatment will be complete.  If by some chance(Dr. Larson promises the odds are small) the cancer has spread to the nodes then we will have to discuss chemo and/or radiation.

I have used the word "oncologist" no less than a thousand times in my life.  Now I am getting used to using the words "my oncologist".  The word "cancer" just takes your breath away.  As we have told people what is going on I have had several people(including Sara) tell me that it just isn't fair that I gave a kidney and now have cancer.  But I don't think God works that way.  I don't think He gives us only bad stuff if we do bad things and gives us only good stuff if we do good things. Truthfully I usually don't know for sure HOW God works, but in the words of my husband, "I wouldn't want to serve a God who I could figure out".  How true is that?  If we knew what God was thinking how much less amazing would that make Him?  And I certainly learned on my kidney journey that He does know the plans He has for me. What appears awful in the moment is a blessing in the long run.  People have told me that I have a great attitude.  I'll be honest. Some days I don't.  Some days I am scared to death.  And some days I get just a little mad at God that I have to deal with this right at the time when I thought I was ready to start a whole new chapter of donation promotion.  But He obviously knows what He is doing.  I have to keep remembering that.  And I have to be happy that out of all of the awful cancers out there I did manage to get one with a really high survival rate! Hopefully cancer diagnoses are limited to "one per person" :)  Stay tuned...God's got a plan!!

Three Years and Spreading the Word!

It was three years yesterday.  I simply cannot believe it.  Time is marching on.  For some reason as I was reflecting on what the last five years have brought -- from the beginning of my journey until now -- I became emotional thinking of what all has come to be.  Lonnie has a kidney, Sara has a kidney, I have a kidney... :)  Life is GOOD!

So now transplant stories surround me.  It seems like at least a few times per week someone sends me a story, tags me in a story on Facebook, I receive a story via Google alerts, I read a story on Twitter, or I happen to see one in the news.  I read/watch every single one that I come across and I thank God every time for the miracle of organ, tissue, and bone marrow transplant.  I am always still in awe of the circumstances that surround every story.  There is no doubt in my mind that God is orchestrating them all.  There is the story of Cindy, a co-worker from the main center of the clinic where I work.  Cindy had recently felt the urge to consider kidney donation.  She happened to talk to Sarah, a colleague of mine who I mentioned four years ago in my blog that donated a kidney to her friend's father.  Sarah told Cindy that I had recently posted a random story about a guy named Mike in Michigan who needed a kidney.  Sarah contacted me to pass on Mike's information to Cindy.  She was tested and although we thought maybe this is where Cindy's story would lead, she was not a match to Mike.  But it gave Mike some hope that there are people out there who are willing to donate to him.  And it gave Cindy the urge to press on.  She knows that God has a plan for her -- now she just waits on Him!  And today was a special day for a friend named Jeannette who I met through a Living Donors Facebook group.  Jeannette and her brother went into surgery today so she could donate a kidney to him.  The last I heard all was going well!

I am now at a point where I am ready to "take this show on the road", so to speak.  It has been my desire to start some sort of organ donation foundation or public awareness group.  I do have some leads that I am looking into at this point.  The need for donors just continues to grow.  It's heartbreaking really to see the data, but even more so to see the actual people who are waiting for a life-saving donation.  So stay tuned!  More to come!!

Sara's most recent check-up at UW was great!  She continues to be healthy and happy.  I no longer see the doctors at UW as I was dismissed from their care at the two year mark.  Next week I will see my regular primary care physician and have my "kidney numbers" done.  I expect all good news!

Taylor's Gift

Last month I wrote in a post about the guest blog I submitted to the Taylor's Gift Foundation's website.  Today I was so honored to have my blog published on their website.  Taylor's Gift is an incredible organization that tirelessly promotes organ donation.  Although the Storch family experienced deep tragedy when they lost Taylor, they chose to use this sorrow and heartbreak to help other families in their times of great need.  I have posted the link to my story below.  I hope you enjoy:

http://blog.taylorsgift.org/a-roller-coaster-of-hope

If I Could Tell Them...

Tonight I got to do one of my favorite jobs -- be a donor mentor.  I take such great joy away from talking to kidney donors as they navigate their journey.  The excitement, nerves, impatience, concern, compassion, and curiousness -- I remember those feelings so well!  Most of the potential donors I talk to definitely know how the transplant will change their recipient's life.  But so very few of them even realize how much it will change their own life.  I know for sure that I had no idea!  In a way I wish I could express to them what it will be like when they finally accomplish the donation.  But then I realize that if I could tell them, it would steal away the moment for them.  If I could tell them, it would take away the awe and the joy of the moment when they realize that a part of their body is now alive and functioning inside another human being.  If I could tell them, it would take away the moment of happiness that will fill their heart when they know for sure that one of their life's purposes has been fulfilled.  So for now, I just share my experiences and answer their questions.  And when I hang up the phone I sit back and smile.   Another day, another donor, and two more lives forever changed.

Looking Back

A very special man was on my patient schedule today -- Lonnie.  And yes, he does give me permission to share this with you so I am not violating any privacy laws :)  I have an optometry intern working with me right now, so Lonnie and I were filling her in on our journey while we all sat in the exam room.  As we shared our story with Ashley, I was taken back in time to that date four years ago this month when Lonnie was sitting in my exam chair just as he was today. That was the day he told me he would for sure need a kidney in the near future.  I was once again simply amazed at the hand of God as he took us from that day to where we all are today.  I couldn't even fathom at that time all of the ups and downs that we would go through.  I couldn't ever predict the emotional journey that Lonnie and I would take, along with his whole family.  I couldn't see that Sara, Craig, and Ashlyn -- along with all of their extended family and friends -- would enter into our lives.  It made me think of other times when our lives are about to suddenly change. Maybe it's the first time you meet your future spouse, the day you lose your job, the day you or a loved one are diagnosed with cancer, the day your first child is born, or even the day you win the lottery!  The most incredible thing to me about all of these times is that although we may have no clue that our lives are about to change forever, God is never, ever surprised.

I recently submitted a guest blog to the Outlive Yourself blog on the website of the Taylor's Gift Foundation.  If you have never heard the story of Taylor Storch, please take the time to visit their website at www.taylorsgift.org.  Taylor was just 13 years old when her life was tragically cut short in a skiing accident.  Through their unbelievable grief, Taylor's parents Todd and Tara Storch let Taylor give the ultimate final gift -- the gift of life.  Taylor's organs helped numerous people live a longer and better life.  I had read Todd and Tara's book telling the story of their daughter, but until I submitted my guest blog I never realized that Taylor's death occurred in March of 2010, right about the same time that I was telling Lonnie I would give him my kidney.  Taylor's family could never imagine how their lives were about to change, just like I couldn't.  But God knew.  Do I think God wanted Taylor to die?  No.  Do I think God had an incredible plan to bring joy and good out of a tragedy?  Absolutely.  I was incredibly humbled to receive the email from the foundation telling me that my guest blog was accepted and will be posted on the Taylor's Gift website sometime during the month of April -- National Donate Life Month.  I will be happy to share that with you when the time comes.


 Taylor's Gift Foundation

Back to Blogging

I had an epiphany today.  Well, actually my husband gave me an epiphany today.  Shortly after my kidney donation was over, I stopped blogging.  Well, I did give a couple of update blogs here and there...but I stopped blogging on a regular basis.  In fact, in 2013 I only blogged once -- and that was on my two year anniversary of donating.  The thing is that I knew I wanted to spread the word about organ donation, plus tell my own story, but I really didn't know how. Over the years I have talked to hundreds of people about my story and shared organ donation information.  I have talked to a few groups, and still hope to start up regular speaking engagements.  To this day, rarely a day goes by that someone doesn't ask me a question about my donation, share a donation story to my Facebook page, or ask me how Sara is doing.  I love it that people immediately think of me when they see a donation story and choose to share it with me!  I never get tired of hearing a good donation story -- and they are all good!  I have "met" so many people since my donation(often not in person, but rather through social media).  I met Steph from Iowa (through Facebook) who also had God ask her to donate a kidney.  She donated to little Blake who is just two years old.  Through an online living donors group I was contacted by Brenda from Franklin, Wisconsin who donated several years ago to a woman from her church.  Brenda and I have the same passion for educating others about the joy of donation.  I have the privilege of often seeing the Pryne Family from Wisconsin Rapids, Wisconsin whose 11 year old son Kameron just received a kidney from a deceased donor.  Via Twitter I found Jill, a bone marrow transplant nurse who gets to see the miracles of bone marrow transplant every day.  And amazingly, I have connected with Robin Roberts, also via Twitter, who has been so kind to answer my questions and give her prayers for my mom who recently had a stem cell transplant.

So tonight over dinner Mike and I were discussing how I can "bring this all together" and better work toward my ultimate goal of promoting and encouraging organ, tissue, blood, and bone marrow/stem cell donation.  I have many grand ideas, but I have just not been sure where to start.  In his infinite wisdom, Mike suggested I start blogging again and see where that leads.  I hope to share other stories of donation, along with my own thoughts.  Please share this blog with anyone you know who might be interested in learning more.  I hope you too will continue to follow my journey.  And as always, please keep passing along those great stories!    

Over Two Years Out

My mom asked me recently if I had updated my blog lately.  I told her it had been awhile, but I didn't realize just how long until I looked today.  It's been over a year!  Life certainly has returned to totally normal in the 2 years since my kidney donation, but the mission of raising awareness of organ and tissue donation will forever be in my life.

In October I was invited to take part in a ceremony honoring all of the living donors at UW Hospital from the previous two years.  Craig and Sara traveled to Madison that day with Mike and me.  As I looked around the ballroom in that hotel that day, it occurred to me that everyone was there for different reasons.  Some had donated to family members, some to friends, and some to total strangers.  There was even one guy who had donated to his ex-wife!  Talk about sacrifice!  They spoke of donor chains and paired exchanges, of which there were many in this group.  As we each got called up one by one to accept our award the audience applauded every single one of us.  It was truly emotional!  We each received a medal of honor, along with a certificate from Governor Scott Walker thanking us for our donation.  Many recipients were in the audience as well and it struck me that you simply could not tell the donors from the recipients in most cases -- that's how healthy everyone looked!  I again got to see Chris, my transplant coordinator.  Earlier this year I tweeted a picture of Chris and me to UW letting them know what an incredible employee they have in her.  She told me that they recognized her at a department meeting due to my tweet.  I was so glad to hear that!  She deserves it!

The other honor I received this year was my name on the living donors wall at UW Hospital.  It took them awhile to get it up as the wall was being redone.  Just last week my family and I were in Madison and stopped by to take a look at it.  I still get emotional when I read the words that UW has posted on that wall:

I don't tell you about all of these honors to show you what a great thing I did.  Although I am totally honored that UW would choose to do these things for me, I would have donated anyway.  Donating a kidney was one of the most rewarding and humbling things I have ever done.  I know God had it in His plan for me.  

Life has been busy for the past couple of years and I have somewhat neglected my original plan -- that is to speak of my journey to groups who want to hear a great story.  I want to bring awareness to organ and tissue donation, but also bring glory to God for what He did to orchestrate this event.  My work as a donor mentor is very rewarding, but it is done after the donor already made the decision to donate.  We now need more people to make that decision.

Tonight we attended a benefit for Kameron Pryne, an 11 year old boy in our community who is in need of a kidney.  The need for donors is great.  Kids like Kameron and adults like Sara need a chance at a better life.  If you(or your group) want to hear more, please contact me!   

One Year Later...

Well, here I am...one year after donating a kidney.  When people ask, I often say I feel no different now than I did before donating a kidney.  Physically, my life is almost exactly the same.  About the only thing different now is that I think twice before adding salt to a meal.  Oh and also I think often that I should drink more water(maybe this year I will ACTUALLY drink more water!)  But that is about it.  It's as simple as that.  Me with one kidney is the same as me with two kidneys.  And that is the cool thing about living donation.  If I didn't have the physical scars to prove it, I would have a hard time convincing anyone that I had actually done it.

Now, if we are talking about other aspects of my life besides the physical, well those have certainly changed.  I have gained a new sister in Sara -- and a whole new family in all of her relatives and friends!  I have learned so much about organ donation in general and have truly become an advocate for it.  I have found out how much my friends and family care about me with all of their love and support.  And I have been forever blessed.

This coming Friday I am getting a permanent reminder of my journey...a tattoo!  As of this moment I still do not know where on my body the tattoo will be, but I am planning on getting a small cartoon kidney with the date of our surgery, July 21, 2011.  A very talented artist, Dawn Greenwood, will be doing this for me.  I cannot wait!

As I look ahead to the future I know that my goal is to tell my story wherever God opens the door.  My hope is that it will accomplish two things: the first being to share my journey of faith, and the second being to promote organ donation.  I thank God that he has given me this journey.  My life has stayed the same...and my life has forever changed.

Trey's Story

Today Mike, the boys, and I had the opportunity to hand out organ donation information for UW at Golden Sands Speedway, the local race track.  We met up with Trey Schwab, Outreach Director at UW's Organ Procurement Organization.  I had met Trey last month at the Donate Life event I spoke at in Wausau.  When I originally signed up to volunteer for UW, Trey was the one who I corresponded with so we have had several opportunities to chat via email as well.  Today through talking with Trey we found out a little bit about his background.  Trey was an assistant basketball coach for the Minnesota Timberwolves and also Marquette University.  In fact, Mike noticed that Trey was wearing a Final Four ring from the 2002-03 season when Dwayne Wade played for Marquette.  Being a huge basketball fan, Josh was way impressed!  We got busy with our duties today and at one point it started raining hard so our time was cut a little short.  When we got home I realized that I never asked Trey about  his donation story.  I only knew that he was an organ recipient -- but I didn't even know which organ!  I figured since he had been a basketball coach I could likely find his story online.  I Googled his name and was amazed at what I read.  I wanted to update my blog today to give you a brief synopsis of Trey's incredible story.  So here it is:

Trey had the rare lung disorder known as idiopathic pulmonary fibrosis.  Without a double lung transplant he would die.  In February of 2004 Trey got the call that a set of lungs was available for him.  After a very successful lung transplant Trey was in the ICU at UW Hospital.  One day Trey stood up from his bed and realized he just didn't feel right.  He was having trouble breathing.  Doctors soon realized that Trey had a 16 inch blood clot wedged between his pulmonary arteries.  He stopped breathing and the hospital started CPR.  Trey went a full 40 minutes with no pulse while doctors rushed him into the operating room for surgery to remove the clot.  His doctor, Dr. Robert Love, the head of the lung transplant program at UW said that the vast majority of patients would never leave the operating room alive.  But the other thing Dr. Love did was pray, because he says that some things are simply out of doctors' hands.  As you know, since my family spent the day with Trey today, he did indeed survive that day.  Trey had not one, but two miracles -- the first when he received his lungs and the second when he was literally brought back from death.

Every time I hear an organ donation story it amazes me.  My passion continues to be in educating people in what organ donation can do.  We had several people tell us today when we were handing out information that they were not healthy enough to be a donor.  But that is simply untrue in most cases.  Even unhealthy people can often contribute something -- if not organs, perhaps tissue, corneas, skin, or bone.  You would be amazed.

We also worked alongside a man by the name of Steve today.  Steve's daughter tragically died at the age of 21.  In her death, over 40 people received the gift of life.  Incredible.  Simply incredible.  Organ donation works.

Two Milestones!!

Yesterday marked two milestones...I turned 40 and Sara and I had our 10 month anniversary of the surgery.  that forever changed both of our lives. Turning 40 didn't make me too excited, but my husband, family, friends, co-workers, and Facebook friends sure made it a time to remember.  And fortunately I don't feel 40!  Not yet anyway!!

Last month my friend Mike Breezee asked me when I was going to update my blog.  I looked back and realized I had not done so since January!  Sara and I are both doing so well that sometimes it feels there is not much new to report.  But in reality a lot has happened since January.  So Mike...this update is for you!

In February, Sara's friends and family held an extremely successful benefit to help pay for medical costs incurred with the transplant.  It was an incredibly fun day of music, food, games, friends, and best of all...a cake walk!  I was so happy to see the huge turnout of people who came out to support Sara, Craig, and Ashlyn -- not to mention the work that the organizers put into the day!  It is times like this that remind you how generous people can truly be.

In March I received a letter from UW Transplant Clinic telling me that I had been selected to be a donor mentor.  Donor mentors assist the kidney transplant clinic in preparing living kidney donors for surgery.  Before my surgery I was matched up with a mentor who called me to answer any questions I might have about the surgery itself.  The idea behind the mentor program is that nobody knows better what donors go through than those who have been there.  I found the program to be very helpful as my mentor gave me some tips that the medical staff simply didn't think of -- or possibly didn't even know.  In mid-April my family and I traveled to Madison so I could take part in a 4 hour training to become a mentor.  (That night we also had the opportunity to go on to Milwaukee to attend the Brewer game with the Donate Life Wisconsin group)  This past week I received my first mentor assignment.  I left the donor a message and at this point am waiting for a call back.  I am eager to talk to a potential donor about what I know will be a life-changing event in their life!

The last weekend in April Sara and I attended Donate Life North Central Wisconsin's scavenger hunt and dinner.  I was honored to be asked to be a speaker at their event that evening.  As I told my story, I looked around the room at the hundred or so people whose lives had been touched in some way by organ donation and I couldn't help but smile.  It is my heart's desire to continue to speak at events and to groups and I pray that God will open up those opportunities for me in the future.  If every time I tell my story just one person is inspired by it, then my time will be well worth it.

On Memorial Day my family and I will be at Golden Sands Speedway in Wisconsin Rapids working with UW to promote organ donation.  Our family has the job of handing out "Yes I Will" information to all who come to the races that day.  I am so happy that Mike and the boys are willing to help me with this passion that I have to spread the word that organ donation works!!

Today I had an email from Sara.  It turns out that Colleen Belle is kicking up her heels and acting much younger than her 40 years.  Sara's labs were all within normal range!  The great thing about this is that Sara can now decrease her anti-rejection medications.  What wonderful news!

Life has been busy, but I am so grateful for the time and opportunities I have been given.  I am also thankful for an incredible husband and kids who support me in all that I do.  I have said it before, but I never grow tired of saying it...God is good...all the time!!

If you haven't registered yet, do so today!! If you don't live in Wisconsin, check online for your own state's registry.

Six months already!

Today marks the six month anniversary of our surgeries.  I just cannot believe it has been that long already!  The time has flown.  Although I don't think about my health on a daily basis, in looking back I can honestly say that I feel stronger and healthier each month that passes.  I would say that my strength and ability to "do life" is almost back to 100% at this point.  They told me at the hospital that it could take 6 months to a year to get totally back to my starting point.  I am so grateful that I am feeling so well!  Sara is also doing great.  She did have a flu bug this week, but she is feeling better now.  I worry about her every time she doesn't feel 100%.  But neither one of us could ask for a better outcome.  We feel super!

This week Friday Craig, Sara, Mike, and I will be conducting an interview with Cami Mountain of Wake Up Wisconsin for Channel 9(WAOW) of Wausau, Wisconsin.  Cami and her camera crew will be coming to our home that day to film the story.  I don't know what I am more worried about -- my house being presentable or me being presentable!  I am really looking forward to it actually, since I will take any opportunity I can get to spread the word about the importance of organ donation.  I hope Cami plans on a one hour speech by me :-)

Also coming up very quickly is the benefit that Sara's friends and family have planned to help cover the Solinsky family's expenses for the transplant.  The benefit is being held on Saturday, February 4th at the Marshfield Fairgrounds Jr. Expo Building in Marshfield, WI from noon to 10 p.m.  There will be lots of food, music, raffles, silent auctions, etc.  There is even a cake walk!!  AND they are giving away a week's stay at a beautiful home in Anglesey, Wales -- the island where Prince William and Princess Kate live!  So if you are in town and are free that day, please come out and join the fun.

Organ donation -- both deceased and living -- changes and saves lives.  There is no doubt about it.  Please consider signing up to be a donor after you die.  And if you can consider living donation and want more information, please contact me.  I am always happy to answer questions.

Thank you for reading my blog over the past two years.  I have been humbled by everyone who has told me that they have read it and been touched by it.  I feel in some ways that my journey is coming to an end -- that my story is reaching the final page.  But God may have different plans.  I can only continue to follow His lead.

Check-ups, Creatinine, and Celebrating!

Today Sara and I made the trip to Madison for our 4.5 month visit.  We both had lab work and check-ups and Sara also needed to have an MRI for a study she is taking part in.  Sara's appointment was done before mine.  She came out with a smile on her face and told me that her creatinine level was 1.1.  That is the lowest she can ever remember it being since she has been treated for kidney disease!  I was amazed!  But what came next was even more incredible.  I went in for my appointment and met with the nurse practitioner.  (I have graduated from surgeon to NP now -- must mean I am doing fine!).  She was reviewing my labs with me and told me that my creatinine was 1.11.  I said, "wow, that is what my recipient's was today too".  Sara had told me hers was 1.1, but I wasn't sure what her "third digit" was.  I couldn't wait to get out of the appointment and ask her.  After I was done and all checked out I returned to the waiting room and asked Sara what her exact numbers were.  She referenced her results sheet and...you guessed it...it was 1.11!!  For a fleeting second I thought maybe the lab had mixed up our blood :-)  But, as has so often been the case, I know that God has His hand in the whole process.  There is no such thing as coincidence.  This was all meant to be.  Although a "normal" person has creatinine of under 1.0, the health care providers are very happy with both of us being at this level.  I also was able to see Chris, my coordinator, while I was there.  She and I hugged and talked about how far we have come together.  She has been my go-to person through it all and I am eternally grateful for her patience, answers, and cheerful disposition!  Sara and I celebrated with a trip to Chili's and a little shopping at the Dells outlet mall on the way home.

As Christmas quickly approaches I was thinking back on the blessings of this past year.  I could not imagine last Christmas what this year would have in store for me.  On December 22nd, 2010 Mike and I were at UW having my donor work-up done.  I had no idea that within the year Lonnie would have a kidney and Craig, Sara, and Ashlyn(and all of their family and friends) would come into our lives.  How blessed I am!

Sara's benefit plans are coming along beautifully.  The benefit will be held from noon to 10 p.m. at the Marshfield Fairgrounds Jr. Expo building on Saturday, February 4th.  There will be food, beverages, raffles, music and much, much more!  There is even a raffle for a one week stay in a beautiful home in Wales!  Please mark your calendars and plan to come by!  It promises to be a great time!

Almost Three Months Now

This coming Friday will mark three months since Sara and I had our transplant surgery.  The time has gone so quickly.  I just cannot believe it has been that long.  We are both feeling great!  I only have two lasting effects that I can really pinpoint.  One is mild tenderness to touch in the abdomen.  This is very minor and does not really bother me at all.  The second is much more concerning -- I have lost my ability to stay up really late!  Well, actually I can stay up late, but once I crawl into bed and try to read I am fast asleep quickly.  Mike has had to take my Kindle out of my hand more than once after I am zonked out!  This is a small tragedy since staying up late is a family trait that goes back many generations(well, at least as far as my grandma!).  Luckily the fine folks at UW did warn me about this before surgery, and they reassured me that I should have the ability back within 6 months to a year!  

Today I got a wonderful email from Sara.  Her creatinine level is 1.3.  She said this is the lowest it has been in 10 years!  I almost cried.  I was so happy!  UW has taken away one of her medications and decreased her lab appointments to once per week.  Big accomplishments!  Saturday night we had dinner with Craig, Sara, and Ashlyn.  Sara doesn't know this yet(although she will when she reads this!), but when she left the table to use the bathroom I asked Craig if she really feels as good as what she tells me she does.  I always worry that she won't tell me if something is wrong.  Craig told me that just the other day she told him that this is the best she can remember ever feeling.  Again...felt like crying.  Knowing that Sara's health has improved so much makes me feel so incredible.  I just love it!!  Sara is flying out to San Francisco with her friends Teri and Angie this weekend.  Teri and Angie were there with her for the surgery back in July and this trip had to be delayed from their original plan of August.  I am so glad they can now go when Sara's health is improved.  I just know they will have a great time!!

One final note: Sara's family and friends have started planning a benefit to assist Craig and Sara with expenses related to the transplant.  They do have insurance, but there are so many expenses that you don't even think of with this type of journey.  The benefit is planned for Saturday, February 4th from noon until 10 p.m. at the Junior Fair Building on the Marshfield Fairgrounds.  You are ALL invited to attend!  I will have more information about details as the event gets closer.  I also would ask that you consider whether you could donate anything to this cause.  We had a planning meeting last week and are in need of gift baskets(for silent auction), raffle prizes, baked goods, $$, and just about anything else you think would be helpful!  If you have anything you or your business would like to contribute we would gladly take it!  We would also take any volunteer help for that day!  Or, of course, you can just come as a guest and hopefully take home lots of prizes, eat a yummy meal or two, bid on fun items, and enjoy the day! You can contact me at drjdillon@gmail.com if you have any donations or suggestions for the day.  (That is the end of my shameless plug for help :-) )

I have said it before, but it never hurts to repeat myself: God is good -- ALL THE TIME!!

Back to Reality

Tomorrow it will be 6 weeks since Sara and I had surgery.  That milestone is exciting, but it also means I have to go back to work!  Fortunately, I do love my job so the thought of going back is probably worse than actually going back.  Tomorrow also marks an important day for our kids -- back to school!  Josh will be in 7th grade at Alexander Middle School.  As much as he would prefer not having to go to the actual classes, he does love the social aspect of school.  Isaiah will be in 4th grade so this is his first year at AMS.  He is looking forward to getting out of the elementary school and into the big school.  Mike decided before my surgery that his new job was not what he was looking for so he called his former boss at UMR and asked if they would take him back.  Jeff(his boss) was thrilled to hear he wanted to come back and they are welcoming him with open arms.  Fortunately being in between jobs allowed him to take the past 6 weeks off with me and the kids.  I must say that the time we all spent together in these past several weeks was just priceless.  Last week I asked each of my kids separately if they were glad that their dad and I both got to be with them so much this summer.  They each said "yes, it was great!".  I am so thankful that they still enjoy being with us!

Today Sara went to UW to have a routine biopsy and blood work done.  The biopsy showed NO signs of rejection by the kidney!  Wonderful news indeed!  As soon as they get the lab results back she will hopefully be able to have some of her medications decreased.  Poor girl takes a small meal's worth of medications every day.  She knows it is just what she has to do, but I am quite sure it gets old very quickly!  The other super news is that Sara was able to have her dialysis line removed the week before last!  That line created so many headaches for her and I am so thankful that the doctors are confident that she will no longer need it.

So this is it -- the "end" of my recovery.  For the most part I feel really good.  Of course I have been whining to Mike that it seems like my abdominal swelling is never going to go away.  So he asked me the other day, "What if they told you before surgery that you would always have a bit more of a stomach than you originally did?  Would you still have done it?"  Great perspective smart husband of mine!  That is a no-brainer for me.  YES!  Of course I would have still done it.  What I am complaining about now is so minimal compared to what Sara has gone through.  Physical changes are so minor when you have your health!

Feeling unbelievably blessed!!



 

Surgical Follow-Up

Last Wednesday, Mike, the boys, and I took a trip down to Madison for my first surgical follow-up appointment.  We left early so we could stop at Dick's Sporting Goods to shop for football gear.  After having lunch at TGI Fridays, we headed over to UW.  First I had to have lab tests and then I went down to the transplant clinic to meet with Dr. Bellingham.  After coming in the room and asking how I was doing she immediately asked about Sara.  She was very pleased to hear that we are both doing so well.  Dr. Bellingham removed the 2 extra stitches I had done the day I left the hospital and then basically just took time to talk to me.  I have great respect and admiration for her and all of the doctors and nurses at UW Hospital.  They have been simply wonderful to me throughout this entire process and I cannot say enough good about what they do!  My lab results were given to me by the nurse before I left my appointment.  They had warned me that my creatinine would go up after surgery due to the right kidney having to take over and do all of the work.  Ideally the creatinine should be under 1.0.  Before surgery mine was 0.76.  The day after my surgery it was 1.26.  And last Wednesday it was back down to 1.06!  That was great news.  My hematocrit and blood sugar were running low, but they were not concerned about that at this point.  Dr. Bellingham told me to come back in 6 months, which surprised me since they had originally told me 4 months.  So I made an appointment for February.  The next day, my coordinator Chris called to tell me she was sorry she missed me when I was down there.  Then she told me that I actually DO need to come back in 4 months and that I should never listen to the surgeon -- ha!  Of course she was kidding.  It turns out that health-wise it would be no problem at all to be seen back in 6 months.  However, due to the strict governing of transplant centers, there are two national agencies which require follow-up reports on the donor after surgery.  One asks for a report at 6 months, but the other one wants it at 4 months!  So, Chris had my appointment changed to December, which will also allow me to finish up my Christmas shopping in Madison :-)

Most days I really feel pretty good!  I have been able to get back to doing some fun things and getting out of the house.  Sometimes I get very tired, but they warned me that I should expect that.  I also am waiting for my belly to go back to normal size, but I am fitting in most of my clothes so I guess I am on the right track!  It has been really great to spend time with Mike and the boys while I am recovering.  We are all going to be in for a shock when we resume school and work! 

Sara continues to do great!  Her creatinine today was 1.5.  It has continued to drop, which is awesome!  Tomorrow she goes to Madison for her follow-up appointment.  I am anxious to see what they have to say.  Hopefully they will allow her to finally have her dialysis catheter removed for good!  Friday I had lunch with Sara, her mom Carol, her sister Carrie, and her nephew Seth.  It was the first time I saw her since I left the hospital.  She looks amazing!!  When I look at her I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that this journey of faith had purpose.  It is incredible that God knew what that purpose was all along, and that He would eventually bring Sara and I together and place His hand of grace and protection over us.  It's truly an amazing feeling!

I have had several people tell me that I should turn my writings into a book.  I would love to consider that, but my biggest fear is that nobody would read it -- and also that I have no clue how to start writing a book!  But the other thing I would love to do is speak about my journey.  Not sure where I will start or if anyone even wants to listen, but for now I am hoping and praying for an opportunity to line something up. 

On The Mend!

It has been two weeks today since I came home from the hospital and I can say that I am feeling much better than I did that day!  My biggest hurdle has been the gas pains that I have continued to have.  Apparently most people do not have them this long, but I just had to be different!  In the last two days, however, those seem to be resolving and I am feeling much better.  Yesterday was my first big outing.  Josh played in a basketball tournament in Wisconsin Dells, so we left here about 1:00 p.m.  We went out to eat afterwards with our friends, the Lancours, and did not get back home until 9:00 p.m.  That was a big trip for me!  But I thank God that I felt relatively good all day long.  It really was great to be out and about again.

Sara and Colleen Belle(the kidney) are both doing wonderful!  Sara has her creatinine levels checked every other day.  This number is significant in determining if Colleen is doing her job.  Ideally they would like to see it be 1.9 or lower.  Sara's went as high as 4.8 after surgery, but now has dropped to 2.7!  We are very optimistic and truly believe that this number will continue to drop.  Sara is moving slowly like me, but sometimes she is putting me to shame with the stuff she is doing -- even cleaning out her daughter Ashlyn's closet and drawers!  I told her she is welcome to do that stuff, but she cannot tell me about it.  Makes me feel much too lazy :-)  We are hoping to get together later this week.  I have not seen her since the day I came home from the hospital so I am anxious to see her smiling face!

Wednesday I will take a trip down to UW to see Dr. Bellingham.  Hopefully she is happy with my progress and I won't have to see her back for 4 months.  I figure if I time it just right I can hopefully get some Christmas shopping done in Madison the day of my 4 month check-up!

My friend Jenny wrote to me yesterday and at the end of her message she said, "I still can't believe you donated a kidney".  I realized at that moment that I can't believe it either.  Other than the fact that I am obviously recovering from a surgery, I do not miss my kidney at all.  There is absolutely no change in my health or daily functioning that would suggest I only have one kidney in use.  That is simply amazing to me.  The fact that they can remove a body organ and you can go on as if nothing has changed is pretty remarkable.      As I have wondered out loud before, "why do we even have two??".

I continue to be humbled by the unbelievable support I have received from my husband, kids, extended family, friends, Sara's family, acquaintances, and total strangers.  People are so good.  My house has been filled with beautiful flowers, delicious foods, and awesome cards from so many.  I cannot even begin to say thank you to everyone!!

A Week Later...

Yesterday marked one week post-surgery.  I have meant to post so many times in this past week, but I just never felt up to it.  Today I finally do.  Let me take you back to last Thursday....

Mike and I arrived at the hospital at 5:30 a.m.  They got me settled into the First Day Surgery Unit where all patients who will be admitted after surgery start out.  Several nurses and doctors came to see me and get me ready to go. Shortly after, Craig and Sara arrived.  Despite the strict signs saying only one person was allowed with the patient, they let them come see me.  This was truly the moment we had waited for.  We were here and it was all starting.  I hugged them both and they went out to wait until it was Sara's turn to get started.  My parents arrived shortly after and the nurse then brought them back to see me.  As they were returning to the waiting area Craig and Sara were being led to the room next to me to get her prepped and ready to go.  Around 7:30 or so they told Mike it was time for him to go.  We hugged and said "I love you" and they wheeled me away.  As I left I remember calling out a goodbye to Sara through a closed curtain.  That was the last thing I remember until I woke up in recovery at 12:45!  

Once I was back in my room I started asking about Sara.  My family and Sara's family had waited together in the waiting area, but of course I was done first so my parents and Mike had come to my room.  Mike went out to check on her and said that she was still in surgery and that there had been a few complications, but things were going fine.  It was several hours before she would finally get out of surgery -- right around 5:30 or so -- and when we would find out just how serious those complications really were.  Mike was there when Dr. Sollinger, Sara's surgeon, finally came out to talk to her family.  Dr. Sollinger explained that the vessels to my kidney were very thin.  The surgery had been going along routinely and they had the kidney in and all sewn in place.  It was only once they removed the clamps that they realized they had a problem.  Blood started coming out everywhere.  They naturally tried to suture the vessels more, but that just made the problem worse.  The vessels were tearing and the surgeons couldn't see what they were doing.  Sara was losing blood and they needed to make a decision.  If they just clamped off the vessels, the kidney would die and be useless.  They kept giving her blood and fluids and tried to decide what to do.  Eventually, Dr. Sollinger removed the kidney, placed it on ice, and clamped off Sara's vessels.  Then he called in Dr. D'Alessandro, the second highest surgeon at UW(Dr. Sollinger is the first).  They spent a lot of time just trying to decide what the best approach was.  They eventually decided to get a donor vessel from the donor bank at UW and see if they could use that to connect the kidney.  They sewed the vessel in place, connected the kidney, and unhooked the clamps. Thank God -- it held.  No bleeding.  But Sara's surgery had just gone from a 2-3 hour surgery to a 7.5 hour surgery and she lost a lot of blood.  She needed to be admitted to the ICU to be watched.  This included leaving a tube in her throat.  Mike went to visit her and said his heart just about broke to see her there, half-sedated, tube in her throat, confused, and so swollen from the fluids.  When he reported back to me, I almost felt guilty.  I felt so terrible for her.  My surgery had been so smooth and here she was in this condition.  But then I remembered that she had the kidney and now we just needed to pray for a successful recovery, along with no rejection.

On Friday the surgery really hit me.  I was tired and sore, had nausea and gas pain, and couldn't keep my eyes open.  But also I was worried about Sara.  Her family stopped by and so did the doctors and all reassured me that she would be okay.  And Mike kept checking in with them and stopping by to see her, bringing me back updates.  Friday night my friend Becky brought my boys to the hospital.  It was so good to see them even though I could hardly stay awake!  Saturday morning I woke up feeling miserable, but by afternoon I was starting to perk up and so glad to be able to talk to the boys and Mike.  I also got the great news that Sara would be moved to a regular room that night, just down the hall from me.  And, it also sounded like I was going to go home on Sunday!  Sometime Saturday, however, my incision started bleeding from the corner.  The doctors came by and put steri strips on it, hoping that would solve the problem.  On Sunday morning, it appeared that maybe it had worked and I got up to take a long-awaited shower.  It was then that I realized that the strips did not hold at all.  My incision was bleeding everywhere.  The resident on call tried calling my surgeon, Dr. Bellingham, to see what she wanted him to do, but she was not available.  He was reluctant to put any more sutures in as Dr. Bellingham is known for her beautiful incisions and doesn't like to leave much scarring! I reassured him that I did not care if my 3 inch bikini line scar had a little more depth to it!  He told me to be sure I told Dr. Bellingham that when I saw her next so that he didn't get in trouble.  Then he proceeded to put 2 sutures in and stop the bleeding once and for all.  Mike and I then took the much-awaited walk down to see Sara.  She was still pretty drugged up and couldn't keep her eyes open long, but I was so thankful to finally see her.  After that, Mike and I left the hospital and headed home.

This week has been a slow progress toward recovery.  I really never had much for pain at the incision site and thankfully needed no pain meds since I was in the hospital.  I did however have unpleasant gas pains and nausea.  But each day that seems to subside a bit more and I can now say that I feel like I am getting back to my old self.  Well, except for this huge, bruised stomach I now have!  I am starting to think maybe they removed my kidney and implanted a baby! :-)  But that too will resolve and eventually I will be left with only minimal scarring.  Sara is making tremendous progress at the hospital.  She has started Facebooking again, which means we know she is improving!  The kidney isn't quite up to speed yet, so this morning they did a biopsy just to be sure all is well.  The results were good!  Colleen Belle is indeed waking up!  I cannot wait for Sara to be able to get home and see her precious daughter Ashlyn.  She has handled her mom's absence like a champ and her finger is healing well from her dog bite.  And how great it will be for Craig to get back home as well.  Those days in the hospital can be so long and even though he did come home briefly earlier in the week, it will be such a relief for them to all be together again as a family.  

When I look back on what should have been a routine kidney transplant between two "thirty-something" girls, I am just amazed at how it all played out.  Dr. Sollinger has done over 3,000 transplants and said it was the most difficult surgery he has ever done.  He even said that at one point during the surgery he was very close to just leaving the kidney out, closing Sara up, and calling it a day.  But thanks to his and Dr. D'Alessandro's persistence, Sara has the kidney she needs.  Someday maybe we will know the reason that this was all more than we ever imagined -- or maybe we won't.  In the end all that matters is that Sara ends up living a long, healthy life. 

This Is It

Well, here I am....just 8 hours from the time I need to report to the hospital and 10 hours from surgery time.  I keep thinking maybe I will get nervous, but so far I am not nervous at all -- just very excited!  This morning my alarm went off at 4:07 a.m. and less than a minute later I received a text message.  I wondered who in the world was texting me at 4:08 a.m.  Turns out it was my lifelong friend Jolene telling me to have a good trip and that she was praying for Sara and I.  I texted her back and asked her why on earth she was up.  When she replied she said that her dog had gotten up to go to the bathroom at 4 a.m. so she figured that was God's way of telling her to get in contact with me.  Very cool!  At 5:10 a.m. Mike and I headed to Madison.  We arrived about 7 a.m. and had a full morning of pre-op visits including a physical, EKG, chest x-ray, MORE blood draws, urinalysis(NO BLOOD -- YAY!!), admissions, nurse visits, meeting with the surgeon, and talking to a pharmacist.  My coordinator Chris also stopped in to visit me and delivered me a bag of goodies, including a "Donate Life" polo shirt, a travel blanket, puzzle book, deck of cards, Lifesaver gummies, bottled water, Crystal Light, and a nice handwritten note from Chris herself.  After the morning we met up with Sara and Craig and had lunch in the hospital cafeteria.  Then we all headed over to the hotel to check in.  After we rested a bit and settled in, my parents arrived and we walked down the block to the Blue Moon Bar and Grill for an early dinner.  I had to stop eating at 5 p.m. and then drink some "yummy" lemony drink that is supposed to "clean me out" for surgery.  When we got back we found a comfy spot in the hotel lobby to sit and chat for awhile.  Sara and Craig talked to Ashlyn and Mike and I talked to the boys for the final time before surgery.

This afternoon while I was checking my email I saw I had an email from the National Bone Marrow Registry.  That is not unusual as I have been on the registry a long time and they often send me newsletters.  I was about to delete it when I noticed that it said something about a potential match.  I clicked on the email and it said that I was a potential match for a patient and I should call or email the Registry as soon as possible!  I couldn't believe it.  I glanced at the top of the email and it showed the date that I originally had registered with them -- July 22, 1991.  It will be my 20 year anniversary on Friday!  In all that time I have only been contacted once to tell me that I was a potential match for a patient.  That was back when I was in college!  And now, just a day before I was about to donate a kidney I was receiving this email!  Crazy!  I emailed them back and they called me right away.  The lady just laughed when she talked to me and said that for now they would place me on "inactive" status for approximately 6 months.  She wished me luck on my donation tomorrow.  Now I have no idea why this would happen right before my kidney donation...nor did I realize I was just 2 days away from my 20 year anniversary with them!  But I am sure someday it will all make sense -- just like this kidney journey has. 

To my family, friends, co-workers, friends and family of Lonnie and Sara, acquaintances, and total strangers who may be reading my blog -- a heartfelt thank you from the bottom of my heart.  At this moment, the night before surgery, I feel your love, your prayers, and your thoughts.  I have been humbled by the support you have all given me.  I will be eternally grateful.  And to God...thank you for the ride of a lifetime!  You have proven to me that You are eternally faithful and that Your love endures forever.  And to Sara...this is it!  We finally made it!  I look forward to your lifelong friendship.  You are my family now.